Saturday, January 20, 2007

WHY BLOG?


I have been trying to journal for some years now, but I never follow through. It's not that I can't write. I am a writer after all. A former journalist, I now call myself a Wordsmith. The newspaper reporters I worked with loathed this word. However, I think it is a perfect title. A smith is a crafter, be it of horseshoes, gold or words.

So what is the problem with my previous attempts at journaling? The errors. I can't stand the the scratch outs, the ink blotches, the feeling that everything I've written is wrong, wrong, wrong. I am too used to composing my stories on the computer. There, I can re-work them as much as I want before I hit "Save". Therefore, I think computer blogging is perfect for me. I also want to combine words with pictures and images, without the cutting and messy adhesives.

But why journal in the first place? I'm no peacock, with a compulsive need to show myself off to the world. But I want to also prove that I exist outside my own head. I have a rich inner life that no one sees. I'm sure a lot of people have no clue what I am really like, including, I suspect, my own daughter. To the world, I am fat, frumpy and fiftyish. to my bosses, I am just a peon, a drone. I see myself as fey and whimsical, with not a little bit of mystery and magic and mysticism thrown in.

I have purchased a lot of books on journaling, including one titled "Writing to Save Your Life". Yes, I think journaling will help me save my life. I do have a lot of baggage to unload. It might as well be on the computer screen instead of in my brain. I'm trying to amp up my creativity, free my soul, explore my spirituality, find my self and find my way. (I'm not asking for much, am I?)

3 comments:

Carmen in California said...

I love to come and see what was the very first entry and no surprise what I found out... and I love it and I relate to it very much. Again, Thank you for being out there and being you!
"But I want to also prove that I exist outside my own head. I have a rich inner life that no one sees. I'm sure a lot of people have no clue what I am really like"

Ninnie said...

Wow. Thought I would start at the beginning of your blog. I to start journals over and over again just to stop in a few months. Mainly because I to hate the scratch outs. My mind and hand not running in tandem. One getting ahead of the other. I always think oh wait I should have written about that before that. Thanks for visiting my blog. Now back to checking yours out.

Cat said...

I somehow stumbled upon your blog a couple days ago and found myself here again today. Like Carmen in CA, I like to read first posts, and it resonates with me. You are a beautiful wordsmith and I am so excited to read through your blog. I have a feeling it will be my go-to when I'm feeling overwhelmed and need a break. Thank you for all the energy you put into this online journal. I know I will learn a lot. :)